Farage’s Brexit Fairy Tales: The Never-Ending Blame Game

A Reply To By Martyn Brown & Katie Harris Of The Express

Ah, Nigel Farage. Like an ageing rock star still belting out his one hit from the '90s, he just can’t let Brexit go. According to The Daily Express, he’s back on his favourite soapbox, claiming that Brexit hasn’t "been delivered properly"—which is a bit like saying your soufflé failed because the oven was too European.

Nigel, mate, Britain left the EU years ago. We’ve slammed the door, burnt the bridge, and thrown away the map. The problem isn’t that Brexit was "unfinished"—it’s that it was built on fairy dust and flag-waving nonsense. But fine, let’s play along and debunk the latest instalment of Farage’s Brexit Fantasy Hour.

‘Brexit Has Not Been Delivered Properly’ – The Classic Cop-Out

Ah yes, the old "we just didn’t Brexit hard enough" excuse.The UK fully left the EU. The Single Market? Gone. The Customs Union? Gone. Free movement? Gone. The deal Boris Johnson signed—and Farage cheered—was implemented in full.
If Brexit hasn’t ushered in the golden age of prosperity promised, it’s because Brexit itself was the problem, not some mythical betrayal.

Reality check: The UK got the Brexit it voted for. It’s just turned out to be a bit… well, rubbish.

‘A US Trade Deal Will Save Us’ – The Make-Believe Lifeboat

Farage still clings to the idea that a US trade deal will fix everything, like a man waiting for a bus that’s been cancelled since 2016. The US isn’t interested. Even Trump, a fellow Brexit cheerleader, didn’t prioritise it.Biden’s administration? Not a chance. The "special relationship" barely extends beyond awkward handshakes now.US food standards (hello, chlorine chicken and hormone-fed beef) are a regulatory nightmare, making any deal politically toxic.

Reality check: The US isn’t coming to save us. And even if it were, no trade deal could replace the economic hole Brexit has left.

‘Britain is More Influential Post-Brexit’ – A Delusion for the Ages

Nigel points to AUKUS (the nuclear pact with the US and Australia) and Britain's support for Ukraine as proof that Brexit has strengthened Britain’s global role.

AUKUS had nothing to do with Brexit. We’d have been involved anyway. Ukraine? The EU has actually been leading on aid and policy, while we… well, we’ve sent some weapons and shouted a bit. Britain has lost diplomatic influence, no longer shaping EU policy or trade deals.

Reality check: Brexit didn’t make Britain "taller on the world stage." It made it the guy standing outside the club, shouting at the bouncer.

‘The Brexit Vote Was About Immigration’ – A Convenient Rewrite

Now that the economic argument has gone up in flames, Farage is back to his old favourite: blaming immigration.

Net migration hit a record 1 million in 2023—higher than before Brexit. The UK needs foreign workers to fill Brexit-induced shortages in health, agriculture, and hospitality. The "points-based system" was supposed to reduce migration but has increased visa approvals instead.

Reality check: Brexit didn’t stop immigration. It just made it more bureaucratic, expensive, and chaotic. But sure, blame the foreigners.

‘The UK Economy is Outperforming the EU’ – A Flat-Out Lie

Farage insists Britain is thriving post-Brexit. Meanwhile, reality begs to differ:

The UK is the only G7 country still below pre-pandemic GDP levels. The Office for Budget Responsibility (OBR) estimates Brexit has cut UK GDP by 4%—permanently. UK inflation? Higher than in the Eurozone. Foreign investment? Falling as businesses ditch "Global Britain" for actual global markets.

Reality check: Brexit’s economic record makes Black Mirror look like a feel-good romcom.

‘Brexit Has Helped British Businesses’ – The Opposite is True

Farage vaguely acknowledges that small businesses are struggling—but naturally, he won’t blame Brexit. Customs red tape has suffocated small businesses trying to trade with the EU. Many have stopped exporting entirely because of border chaos. Fishing, farming, and manufacturing have all taken hits from lost EU markets and higher costs.

Reality check: Brexit has made life harder for UK businesses. Not that Farage will ever admit it.

‘The Small Boats Crisis is a Brexit Betrayal’ – A Convenient Diversion

Farage now links Brexit’s "failure" to illegal migration, because when all else fails, blame the boats. Small boats have nothing to do with Brexit—the UK controlled asylum policy before. The UK’s increase in legal migration is because of Brexit, not despite it.
Asylum seekers make up a tiny fraction of overall migration.

Reality check: Farage knows his Brexit dream is crumbling, so he’s found a new scapegoat.

‘Stopping Immigration is the Answer’ – Because Economic Reality is Optional

Farage’s big solution? Less immigration—because clearly, we haven’t seen enough labour shortages already. The NHS, construction, and agriculture need migrant workers to function. Brexit forced the UK to increase visa numbers to fix staff shortages. Slashing migration would make inflation worse and tank the economy even further.

Reality check: The UK needs migration. Farage’s fantasy that Britain can thrive without it is just that—a fantasy.

Final Thoughts: Farage’s Never-Ending Brexit Blame Game

Nigel Farage has a problem: Brexit happened. It’s real. And it’s not the utopia he promised. Instead of admitting that it was an economic disaster wrapped in a flag, he’s rewriting history:

"Brexit was sabotaged!"
"The US trade deal will save us!"
"It’s the small boats’ fault!"

But no matter how many excuses he churns out, the reality is unavoidable:

Brexit was delivered—and it failed.
It hasn’t made Britain richer, freer, or more powerful.
Farage just needs someone else to blame.

So, Nigel, keep singing the same old Brexit tune. The problem is, fewer and fewer people are buying tickets to your nostalgia tour. You are just a political grifter who thrives on the spotlight, a one-man outrage machine with no solutions—only slogans. And let’s be honest: you’ve done more damage to the UK than nearly any other politician in modern history.

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